1
The lingering spring and snow are endless.
Chunxue, temporarily covering up all the filth in the ancient land, the world looks chaste and pure!
For the pure and endless spring snow, to the children, the utilitarianity is not in these. Under the temptation of snow, the children piled up snowmen with their frozen red hands, sculpted their ideals with their own intelligence, and then praised and judged each other in the frolic.
I am 13 years old, and I have begun to lose my childhood dreams. I just stayed aside, staying in the wall away from the child, with a "serious" book in my hand.
The sun in winter sprinkled on me through the gaps of the sparse dry branches on the side of the street. When I was tired of reading, I closed the book, caught my fingers in the gap between the books, and slowly stepped on the street. Wandering in the snow, sometimes kicking the snow on the ground nervously, the snow was kicked around and fluttered around, and calmness was restored in a blink of an eye.
At this time, I look down on the children who make snowmen. What do these little guys know besides frolics?
I admire myself very much and I feel that I understand everything in life. I am already thirteen years old, and when summer comes, I will go to middle school, and I will move closer to young people.
I walked across the street not far from the children making a snowman. A fat middle-aged stranger dressed in obesity greeted me:
"Boy, are you already 13 years old?"
He stood in the snow with thin clothes and two fat hands crossed on his chest, perhaps to make this gesture to resist the cold. His hair was scattered, like a bunch of yellow and turf grass, his eyes were protruding outwards, his eyelids were thickly hung on it, and a thin yellow and black beard mixed with horns was hanging from the corners of his mouth. At this moment, the woman who didn't know whose family had shamelessly extended the mat directly out of the window, dusted the dirt on the fat man's unkempt hair, the stranger was not angry, just two eyes Staring at me deadly. I just noticed that his face was not caused by obesity, but a kind of floating edema. Maybe he sensed my surprise, but still looked at me kindly and said:
"I think you are a good boy, do you like reading books?"
"Yes." I was relieved, a little proud.
He blinked his puffy eyelids slowly and asked me again, "What book are you reading?"
It should be said that the books I read are not quite commensurate with my current age, but because of this I am proud of it, and of course I feel a little embarrassed. But in the face of this swollen stranger, I answered seriously:
""Wu Lin Wai Shi", by Wu Jingzi."
""Ru Lin Wai Shi"? Can you read it?"
"Why underestimate people? I'm 13 years old."
"Oh, yes, you are 13 years old. If I remember correctly, you are 13 years old..."
"Do you remember?" I frowned and asked, "Why do you remember my age?"
"Ah... that was the thing before." Suddenly, he shook his shoulders with his hands and curled up. His lips began to turn purple and began to tremble.
I can see that he is hard to resist the cold. His tongue didn't work well, so he finally spit out this sentence between the shaking upper and lower teeth: "You, don't you feel cold?" And explained, "All these years, I feel cold all the time, even It’s summer, I still can’t get rid of the cold feeling, probably I have a terrible illness, and I can’t get hot anymore.”
His legs were trembling, and his two black, round-toed shoes kept swapping, but it didn't help him. He didn't even have a pair of roving socks.
"I'm not cold." I said.
I stretched out five fingers and carried a pair of fingerless gloves that my mother gave me with thick and mixed velvet threads. My mother said that this would prevent both freezing and writing.
"How is your mother?"
"You asked her what she did? She didn't know you." I asked him back, feeling that he asked was unnecessary; of course I said these words at all without any malicious intentions.
Unexpectedly, he twitched in pain: "Yes, she may not know me, but we used to know."
I didn't respond to his words, just smiled reluctantly and said:
"However, I have never heard my mother talk about you. My mother has never had friends, and no one has visited my mother."
"Is that true?" he murmured: "Can you take me to your mother? I really want to see her, maybe I am the first friend of yours to go out...but, I am like this now Your mother, will your mother hate it?" He seemed to feel colder, holding his arms closer to his shoulders.
His poor request made me have no choice but to fulfill his request; I did not want to hurt the stranger's heart, maybe my mother would be happy to see her old friend. I nodded.
2
When I took the stranger to open the door and appeared in front of my mother, my mother looked at him up and down in surprise. I said to my mother: "He said he knew you and was your friend in the past."
"What are you doing here?" Suddenly, the mother roared, just like she usually roared when she was mad.
I was terrified. I realized that I had caused a big disaster. I shouldn’t casually bring a stranger to my mother.
From the mother's desperate eyes, I can see that the mother does know him, and is so angry and angry with strangers...
I want to ask this stranger to leave quickly, so as to avoid accidents, but the man is standing at the door like a stone sculpture. His eyes are full of pity and sadness. His rebuke and resentment towards his mother do not seem to be angry. Instead, he turned his head ashamed.
He spoke, and his voice was miserable:
"I, I want to come to see the children, see me, no, see you, your children..."
Everything came so suddenly, so inexplicably, reason told me that it was my father who stood before me!
No wonder when the children were making snowmen outdoors, I saw him twirling around there. A few children still pointed at me with their fingers and said something to him. He was inquiring about me and my mother, but why didn't he tell me directly that he was my father? This unpredictable strange man!
The mother didn’t forgive her father, she was still angry, and she shouted rudely: “You’re going out for me! You’re going out for me! There is no home for you here, the children are the big ones I pull...”
The air seemed to be frozen by the mother's screaming shouts, and the room was dead, sad, and dull.
My father stood rigidly at the door, like a decaying rotten pile stranded on the beach.
With tears in his eyes, and the sorrow of all people in the world, life and death in the past ten years, his wife and other sorrows.
3
My mother continued to yell and shouted loudly to my big brother: "Little Red Guy, what are you doing there? Don't take him to the police station, there is no home here!"
My big brother didn't move, just stared at his father outside with a dull gaze.
The muscles on his father's face twitched and shivered. He turned around silently and walked away quietly. His hope was completely shattered, and he knew that he could never enter this house.
Behind his father, my elder brother moved hard, and his brother sent his father to the police station.
The father was gone, still silent, suffocating silence. Suddenly, my mother said to me aloud:
"Go and take the old dress from the cabinet!" I obediently took the old gown from the cupboard worn by my grandfather. The old gown that the original mother planned to change our clothes for was handed over to her.
The mother took the old gown, took out a needle from the sewing box and picked up a blue thread, twisted the next thread, and put it on the eye of the needle, but I couldn't put it in. I took it from my mother After taking the needle thread and putting it on, she handed it to her mother, who sighed and began to sew on the sleeve.
"Is he my father?" I asked my mother carefully.
My mother gave me a slanted look, bite the thread with her teeth, trembling her lips, and said to me: "Go give him this dress. You tell him, never come here again from now on..."
After talking, the mother cried, so sad, that she sobbed, choked... I still remember how sad the mother was at that time.
4
At the police station, a policeman said to me: "He has already left, he has lifted the reeducation through labor, and worked as a stove-burner in a brick and tile factory in Hefei. He specially took leave to visit you in Shanghai. Your mother refused He, this can't blame your mother, it's because he asked for bitter taste..."
My head started to dizzy.
I left the police station and walked on the street with my mother's old clothes. The street was full of indifferent white snow.
As I stepped on the indifferent thick snow, I saw a man standing in the place where the snowman was standing.
I hesitated for a while and came to him. He suddenly hugged me.
"Son." His tears fell on my shoulders, on the back of my hands, and fell on the snow again, bleak and indifferent snow!
"Dad!" I shouted hard for the first time. He hugged me tighter.
I don't know how long after that, I started to break free from his arms. Hand over the old dress: "Dad, this is from your mother, she told you not to come again..."
The father took over the old clothes, stroking with his hands tremblingly, and gradually raised his head: "How about your brother?"
"died."
The father bit his lip, and it was nailed into the snow like a rotten rotten pile, which was immobile, and seemed to be integrated into the indifferent snow.
5
"Child, dad is gone, you have to live well, you have to treat your mom well, when you grow up, you will know, dad is not sorry for you, really, dad is not wrong..." Father wept By the way, he was so sad.
Perhaps I was afraid of my sadness. My dad took me and led me into a food store. The food store was located at the intersection of Yan'an Middle Road and Chengdu South Road. He stood in front of the counter, shook out a few coins, lined up on the counter, counted again, and said to the salesperson: "Buy a piece of chocolate."
"Have you eaten chocolate?" my father asked me.
"No."
"Oh……"
He stared dullly at the other child in a leather jacket standing by the counter and said, "When Dad sees you again in the future, I will buy you a leather jacket like this..."
Father finally left. I still remember what he promised me.
I looked at his vain back, and a sorrowful void filled my heart, and I felt dazed... It seems that I should say a few words, or shout "Daddy" again, but I just stood blankly on the snow .
Everything is gone!
I lost my father and lost my childhood joy!
I hope that history will not repeat itself, the children of the world will no longer have my childhood...
没有评论:
发表评论